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FamilyDads is a dad-founded and dad-focused organization committed to helping dads prioritize their family. In a culture that minimizes fatherhood, we need to know the tremendous influence we dads have in our sons and daughters lives and destinies, and we need encouragement from other dads as we lead our family.

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Amazing Story From Work

January 6th, 2009
· Filed Under: Money · Work

A dad in Texas shared an amazing story that recently happened at the company where he works.

His story makes a very strong case about our priorities…

===

We all know how the economy is going nowadays, and probably most of us, if not all, are concerned about the near future, our jobs, and praying hard about it.

Yesterday at church I saw a good buddy of mine, and he was not looking good. So I took him aside and asked him what was going on. (We are accountability partners, and we often go straight to the point, no “how are you ?” between us.)

He told me that at his workplace “pink slips” were flying all around him, personnel reduction was the “word of the month,” and he was very worried about his job.

He works in IT and was studying madly to get a very hard IT certification to make his position harder to get rid of.

I understood, since I share his same concern, and I am in the ’same boat’ so to speak.

That made me think, and I told him the story I want to share with you all, that happened in my workplace last week.

Last Monday, as soon as we got to the office, we were told that one of the oldest executive managers in the company, “James” had passed on the night before, in his bed.

James was the General Manager of our most lucrative sales market, he had been the company VP and CFO
in different times, and was one of the oldest employees of the company.

The guy was working 12-14 hours a day, taking very little care of himself, and work was his life.

You all see where this is going, right?

A few days after the funeral, I was in the car with our VP, going to Dallas, for business. In the car we started to talk almost immediately about James and what had happened.

After a few casual comments of sorrow about his death, the VP made a comment that gave me the chills …

She said “You know, James “passing away” is going to save the company a lot of money, his salary was quite good, and all in all, we were considering “letting him go” anyway, for we still have to cut salaries and personnel…”

My heart sunk, for I realized how little “James” the man, the individual, had mattered to the company.

Technically, the comment was right.

Under the moral and “human” perspective, it was chilling.

Today, a week after the event, “James” is nearly forgotten.

Gone, merely a faint memory. His position will not be replaced, the company will save money, and that is the end of a 17 years old career.

Guys, put your time, heart and effort in your family and in God.

I still remember the stories my grandfather used to tell me, and he passed away 25 years ago.

My children still laugh and cherish the stories I tell them about my mother’s grandfather…

It’s just money, folks… rust and moths.

What really matters is in the hearts of people you live with, share laughs, experience life and faith with.

You (we all) are not what your job says.

We are fathers, husbands, a brother, a friend, a son of a wonderful God.

Your company will erase the memory of you in a few days, if you drop dead tomorrow.

Your family will remember you forever — put your sweat and effort where it will bear good fruits.

Sorry for the story, it’s probably depressing, but I felt the urgent need to vent…

God Bless you all, brothers.

TexasDad

===

I pray this story has been a clear reminder to all of us dads of what and who to truly prioritize in 2009.

Blessings to you and your family in this new year,
Joey Watkins
Founder, FamilyDads

PS - The best resource I’ve found on helping dads make and keep the right priorities is–
http://www.dadresources.com/product.asp?itemid=15

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Tags: balancing, career, dad, family, God, Money, prioritites, Work

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Dad Tip for 2009… and read Choosing To Cheat by Andy Stanley

December 30th, 2008
· Filed Under: Uncategorized

As we wind down 2008 and shift our focus to the new year ahead, I’d like to give you what I consider to be a very, very important “Dad Tip.”

Here it is:
Create a list of “must-read” books that you believe will benefit you greatly and help you improve in the area of being a better husband and dad this year.

Then, start reading those books, one at a time. And keep your list on your night stand beside your bed.

Now, depending on how much of a reader you are will determine how many books will be on your list. But I suggest at least one book a month.

There are a surprisingly growing number of books out there that have been written just for us dads on fatherhood and marriage.

Choosing to Cheat by Andy StanleyOne book that I STRONGLY recommend you put at the top of your list — to read at the beginning of the new year and not later on — is a quick but very helpful book by Andy Stanley called “Choosing To Cheat: What Happens When Work and Family Collide.”

I would give a copy to every FamilyDads subscriber if I had the financial means to do so. That’s how strongly I feel about this book.

I know from personal experience after reading and applying to my own life and family how radically transforming the truths in this book are.

The basic premise is that we all cheat. That is, we all make decisions every day to give up one thing in order to gain something else that we consider is of greater value.

Sometimes we cheat in a “good” way, like when we cheat our tastebuds and say no to dessert for the benefit of our waistline. :)

But all too often, when we apply “cheating” to the arena of our schedule, we are faced with a variety of choices and opportunities that are each competing for our attention — our most valuable resource — our TIME.

Work… Family… Hobbies… House Projects… Sports…

The list is endless.

Andy Stanley has spent hundreds of hours with dads who have cheated their families for the sake of their career goals.

One decision after another to work late at the office and cheat family time. Or cheat our children’s ball games and activities because of workloads and work deadlines.

But without making significant changes, cheating our family has the potential to erode the foundations of even the strongest marriages — and damage our relationships with our children.

The solution, strangely enough, is similar to the problem. Both involve cheating.  Simply put, we must choose to cheat at work rather than at home.

Choosing To Cheat is ultimately a book about establishing priorities — those things we say “yes” to even when it means saying “no” to other important things. It is a principle that is already at work in our lives.

When we choose to cheat in accordance with God’s priorities for our lives, it is an invitation for Him to bless us and our family in ways we never dared to imagine.

What will be your priorities in 2009? What will you choose to cheat?

Learn More and Order “Choosing To Cheat” for yourself, or as a gift for a fellow dad, co-worker, or friend, at DadResources.com, the bookstore that supports FamilyDads–
http://www.DadResources.com/product.asp?itemid=15

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Tags: andy stanley, balancing work and family, better dad, better husband, books for dads, career goals, choosing to cheat, dad, families, family time, Fatherhood, Marriage, must-read dad books, priorities, tip, values, work late

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Two Helpful Questions For Dads in December

December 16th, 2008
· Filed Under: Fatherhood · God

December is such a great time of year.

Where I live, we get to enjoy a lengthy holiday season, decorated houses and yards colorfully lit up at night, the sending and receiving of Christmas cards, fantastic Christ-focused music playing in the stores, delicious food with family and friends, and extended downtime from work to spend with our family.

Andy Williams’ song indeed says it best… “It’s the most wonderful time of the year.”

But there’s something else I like that is unique to December…

It gives us an opportunity to do two things:

1. Reflect on the year coming to an end
2. Consider the new year approaching

As dads, this involves significant reflection on our role in our family.

So, fellow dad, how was your 2008?

Here are some questions I’m asking myself as a dad…

Did I spend enough time, quality time as well as quantity, with each of my children this year? How about with my wife?

Did I teach and train my children in the things I wanted them to gain understanding in this year?

Are they closer to reaching my goals for their lives than they were at the start of this year?

Dad, how will 2008 be remembered in your memories?

Among my top family memories are…

1) Attending with my son Andrew our first father/son outdoor camping trip/retreat… which was also a highlight of his year!

2) Enjoying a “1950’s” themed father/daughter dance with Angela. To this day, she proudly displays our dance photo beside her bed.

3) Washing our car “shirtless” with my 5 year-old son Abraham in Florida.I will always remember him asking if he needed to take off his shirt, because he wanted to be “just like dad.”

And my wife and I had a short but relaxing getaway at a nice hotel on a gorgeous beach in Florida… something we very rarely get to do alone without our children in tow.

Dad, let me encourage you as we wrap up this year to set aside some time alone to reflect on the year
we are about to say goodbye to.

Do this together with your wife too. It’s a great bonding experience.

Share your memories and thoughts with one another. Reminisce about the fun times and significant events
and memories from 2008, and even write them down.

And then consider and discuss how you might make 2009 an even better year… for you personally, for your marriage, and for your family.

Listen carefully and openly to your wife’s input.

Spend time praying about this, too, discerning God’s direction for you and your family. Listen to Him most of all.

And commit to honor Him in the new year as the dad of your children, the husband of your wife, and the leader of your home.

Blessings to you and your family,

Joey Watkins

Founder, FamilyDads.com and DadResources.com

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Tags: 2009, dad, dads, december, family, God, holiday season, home, memories, pray, reflect, time with children, train children, wife, wife's input

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Revolutionary Parenting by George Barna, Good Book for Dads to Read

December 11th, 2008
· Filed Under: Daughters · Fatherhood · Resources · Sons · Teenagers

Did you know that over 75,000 books have been written on parenting?

Whoa! That’s a lot of information out there for dads and moms.

And most dads like you and me won’t have the time nor interest to read even a tiny fraction of all those books.

Author George Barna, a dad himself with two daughters, (you may have heard of him, he is also a well-known Christian pollster and researcher) recently published a new book on parenting with a very unique twist:

“To amass a body of knowledge that could be absorbed and applied by all parents to help them mazimize their parenting potential.”

Sounds very worthwhile, doesn’t it?  After all, what parent doesn’t want to maximize their parenting potential?!!

But to write such a book, Barna’s team had to gather specific data from three sources:

1. Telephone surveys nationwide of parents with children under the age of 18. The parents were asked about their challenges, successes, and failures as parents.

2. Existing books on parenting practices, particularly those with a spiritual dimension. Those elements that were identified as significant were studied more closely.

3. Personal interviews of more than ten thousand (yes, 10,000!) young adults in their twenties who were leading “transformed” lives with genuine, mature faith (not merely church attenders.)

These young adults were asked what happened during their formative years that “worked.”

Their parents were then interviewed for their input on upbringing these children.

Would you like to know what the research revealed?

Revolutionary Parenting by George BarnaIt’s all laid out in a concise, timely book by George Barna called “Revolutionary Parenting.”

In the book, Barna starts with a look at the current crisis in American parenting, specifically as it relates to raising children with a Biblical worldview and an understanding of spiritual matters.

The next section… which is the bulk of the book… summarizes the parenting research that his team did.

The final section closes with a very personal chapter called “How Studying Revolutionary Parenting Changed Me” in which Barna talks about ten specific lessons he learned from his research that has impacted his own parenting of his two daughters, and he shares all this with the reader.

One dad reader commented…
“This is one of the few books every Christian parent must read! Great book!!! Wish it had been around years ago! If you are a new parent or even if your kids are already teens — you need this book. It is short: a fast, easy, but meaningful read.”

Learn More and Order Revolutionary Parenting for yourself, or as a gift for another parent you know, at DadResources.com, the bookstore that supports FamilyDads–
http://www.DadResources.com/product.asp?itemid=16

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Tags: biblical worldview, books for Christian parents, books on parenting, dad resources, dads, george barna, good books for dads, parenting, parenting daughters, parenting research, raising children, revolutionary parenting

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Dad Video: Team Hoyt, Dick and Rick Hoyt, Father-Son Team

December 5th, 2008
· Filed Under: Fatherhood

This is one of the most moving videos I have ever watched. Dick Hoyt, you are an inspiration to us fathers. I think I can speak for dads everywhere in saying, “Your strong, simple, unconditional love for your son and desire to be a family dad is both humbling and encouraging to all of us!”

 

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Tags: dad video, dick hoyt, family, father, son, team hoyt

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