A long-time FamilyDads subscriber named Steve recently emailed me a story that may challenge and encourage you today:

Steve worked as a a graphic designer/art director for the past 15 years at a top notch firm in Seattle. He was blessed to work in a field that he enjoys and that always presented new challenges, working with tiny start-ups all the way to bigger national clients, doing projects like logos, posters, web sites, packaging, advertising, merchandising and even some video.

But there was a problem.

Steve’s job was VERY demanding, and he was tied to an office away from his family most of the week. His wife was feeling very isolated from her husband, raising the kids and running the home without his input or leadership much of the time. And their marriage wasn’t doing so well either.

Steve and I emailed back and forth about this.

After much prayer and discussion with his wife, Steve took a very courageous step. He gave notice to his employer that he would be leaving his very secure, well-paying job. This happened last year in 2010 by the way… not the rosiest of times in our economy.

I reconnected with Steve recently and asked him how things were going with his work, and more importantly his family.

Steve spent a short time freelancing after leaving his job. Then, an old client asked him to take a position at their company that is a leader in their industry.

Today Steve drives to an office very close to his home, is able to eat lunch with his family every day, enjoys 3-day weekends, and has much less work-related stress.

His marriage and his family are doing much better too. In Steve’s words, “God has really provided for our family in a way that I hadn’t anticipated. My connection with my wife has been better than it ever has in our 16 years of marriage. Wished I had acted sooner.”

That’s what keeps many of us dads from stepping up for our family. Fear of lack of provision. But Scripture tells us…

“Trust in YHUH with all your heart and do not lean on your own understanding. In all Your Ways acknowledge Him and He will make your paths straight.” -Prov 3:5-6

We must trust our Heavenly Father for our provision — not our work. He will make our paths straight as we trust Him with all our hearts. That doesn’t mean we just quit a job we don’t like, but that we are led by Him and trust Him, rather than the false security of money.

Blessings to you and your family,
Joey, a fellow Family Dad

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In the four years of hosting FamilyDads, I have never specifically reached out to tangibly help dads who are either self-employed or who are employed but in difficult work situations at high stress levels and long hours away from family, and who, if given the opportunity, would pursue an avenue of self-employment that could offer more schedule flexibility and time with family.

So if you are in either of these scenarios, or if you just want to learn practical business strategies and productivity skills from a highly experienced and successful business coach, I want to introduce you to a fellow dad I’ve subscribed to for a while who can help you. His name is Ryan Lee. He lives in Connecticut with his wife Janet and 4 young children.

Ryan is also a best-selling author, speaker, coach, and owner of a very financially successful business that generates 7 figures each month.

Yet Ryan runs most of his business from a local coffee shop with nothing more than a laptop, notebook, and pen to do a few hours of work each day and enjoys lots of time with his family.

Ryan has been featured on the cover of the Wall Street Journal and dozens of other major media outlets.

After college, Ryan worked at a children’s rehab hospital where he helped children with disabilities. He was greatly blessed working with these kids who touched his heart and taught him many valuable “life lessons,” and he went on to launch a fitness website that grew into a multi-million dollar business.

Ryan has just launched a new weekly coaching program that I believe can help a lot of dads and their families. I have personally signed up for this myself.

Ryan explains everything in this video here–
http://www.familydads.com/ryanlee.php

Like I said, I’ve not reached out to dads in this way until now, but I want to do more to help dads maximize family time, and I know that for many of us, our work is often what prevents us from spending more time with family.

If you signup for Ryan Lee’s Inner Circle new weekly coaching program through this link, contact me and let me know. I plan to host group conference calls with all who are part of this with me and we can help one another. I will also share the notes I take from each session with you. Also, in full disclosure, I receive a commission on signups through the link above (which helps me continue to host FamilyDads) but if that offends you, please don’t signup.

Blessings to you and your family,
Joey Watkins
a fellow Family Dad

One of the questions I ask new FamilyDads subscribers is to identify one of their biggest challenges as a dad.

More often than not, the answer I receive has to do with balancing family and work, stress, patience with their kids, and things like that.

However, one new subscriber recently shared one of his biggest challenges as a dad that I had never heard before. It really got me thinking, and I want to challenge you with it too.

He said one of his biggest challenges as a dad is:

“…not having my Dad around to ask advice, he went to be with the Lord 3 years ago.”

Whoa! That is pretty heavy.

I had several reactions when I read it.

First, I don’t want my sons to be in that position when they become dads one day. I want them to be able to come to me for advice and input when they need it. I want them to draw on my experience, insights, knowledge, and wisdom I’ve gained over the years.

Yes, we all will experience physical death at some point (unless our Messiah returns first!), but I want to be around as long as possible for my family. But unless I take personal responsibility for my health now by my choices in diet, exercise, sleep, and several other fitness factors, I’m not doing my part to make it happen.

Second, I reflected on my relationship with my own father. Do I take him too much for granted? How much longer will he be around? Am I taking advantage of his advice and experience? Is there anything I can do to help or encourage his health and longevity? How is our relationship?

And finally, I wondered about other young men who might be in a similar place without their earthly dad to go to for wisdom and advice as they walk this journey called fatherhood. Can FamilyDads do more to support these men? Are there any subscribers who would be interested in building relationships with fatherless sons like this guy?

Well, that’s a lot to think about. I hope it will do just that… get you thinking… about yourself, about your father, about other fatherless men, and about your own sons when they become dads and will need your advice and experience to draw on!

Feel free to contact FamilyDads with any ideas, suggestions, or input on any of these thoughts.

Blessings to you and your family,
Joey Watkins
Founder, FamilyDads

P.S. – FamilyDads Fitness is for dads who understand the importance of giving attention NOW to your health and fitness to avoid health problems later that would impact both you and your family. Learn more

“Life is what happens while you’re busy making other plans.”

Maybe you can relate to that quote by John Lennon. I sure can!

Most dads I know, including myself, are busy making plans… plans for our work, plans for our weekends, plans for our family, plans for our house, our yard, our money, and so on.

But while we’re busy making all these plans… well, life happens.

Diapers need to be changed. Attitudes have to be dealt with. Spouses need to be communicated with. Dishes need to be washed. Bathrooms need to be cleaned. Bills need to be paid. Grass needs to be mowed.

And before we know it, our kids are no longer infants, toddlers, or grade school age. They’re in high school. Or college. And then ready to launch out as young adults on their own life journey.

I was reminded of this once again last weekend when my 2nd oldest son somehow reached his 8th birthday. How did that happen?!? How I wish I could find the “pause” button to keep my children from growing up so fast.

So let me encourage you today, fellow dad, to live in the moment.

“Carpe Diem.” Seize the day.

Take joy in your daily routine. Seriously.

Appreciate where each of your children are right now at their stage of development. And live each day engaged with them.

And engaged with your wife.

It’s time now for me to go spend some time holding my 6-week-old son and enjoying his chubby-cheeks baby smile… because I’ll be celebrating HIS 8th birthday just a few short months from now too!

Blessings to you and your family,
Joey

P.S. – Do you have a son or daughter graduating from high school this month? Make it a very special time and memory of how much you love them and are proud of them. Idea: Write a hand-written heart-to-heart letter to them from Dad. They will keep it for a very long time, perhaps even after you’re gone.

Have you ever been at a place in your marriage where you and your wife were not lined up in your priorities? Maybe you wanted to focus on items 1, 3, and 5, but she thought items 2, 4, and 6 should be given higher priority.

This can quickly begin a cycle of strife and stress that will not be resolved until root issues causing the division are dealt with.

Much marriage division is the result of DI-vision. That is, two visions. My vision is different from my spouse’s vision. I see things from one perspective, and she sees them from another. I place greater importance on certain things, while she places higher importance on others.

I have found that talking things through, thinking aloud together, and trying not to be overly defensive with “my position” can help. I need to share *why* I feel a certain way about a matter, while my wife tries to see things from my perspective. And she needs to share while I listen and try to see things from her perspective.

Even doing this may not resolve differences in one conversation, but then again it might. And it’s worth doing.

We also need to pray and seek Divine guidance in the areas of our division.

There may be fears, insecurities, or other areas of sin that need to be confessed and corrected.

It may help to get together with another couple we both respect and share with them the challenges we are facing in our marriage.

Finally, we husbands are instructed to honor our wives:

“You husbands live with [your wives] according to knowledge, giving honor to the woman, as to the weaker vessel…” -I Peter 3:7

If your marriage is challenging right now, is there any way in which you are not honoring your wife? Are you giving her the value that is due her as a woman and as a more fragile vessel?

Blessings on your marriage,
Joey

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