by Joey Watkins, Thursday, September 4, 2008

In less than 60 days, many people across the United States will go to their local polling location and cast their vote for the next U.S. President. Predictably, the news media is fixated on John McCain and Barak Obama. Many, if not most, people look to the President as the individual who will solve the pressing problems facing the country.

However, there is a FAR more important and powerful leader than the winner of the upcoming presidential election.

That leader is YOU and me, Dad!

As dads, we are the most powerful person in our children’s lives. What do I mean by that? I’m talking about the level of INFLUENCE we have with them.

We influence them with our words, our actions, the time we spend with them, the time we don’t spend with them, what we teach them, what we model to them, how we relate to our children and our wife, our attitude toward our work, what we spend money on, what we do with our “free time,” and so on.

We have this unique influence JUST BECAUSE WE ARE THEIR DAD.

And it is FAR greater influence than the President has — both in this life and for eternity.

Dads who are committed to leading their families, demonstrating true loving fatherhood, praying for their spouse and children regularly, and instilling their values, faith, skills, and character into their children are the foundation for solving any country’s problems.

John McCain, Sarah Palin, Barak Obama, Joe Biden, or any other politician is NOT the answer… nor the problem.

Your thoughts? Encourage and challenge other dads with your comments below.

If you have a son, grandson, work with boys, teach a boys Bible study, or know another dad who has boys, then this message is for you…

As part of the transition to manhood, boys desperately need their dads or other adult men in their lives to teach them about work, and to develop healthy attitudes toward work and a willingness to work for God’s glory.

The best way to do this is apprenticeship, where a boy “shadows” his dad or other adult men and learns about work and character by example.

An excellent resource I am using to teach my own sons about work is “Created For Work: Practical Insights For Young Men.”

The author, a dad himself and a carpenter by trade, tells inspiring stories from his own life and work — real-world stories that fascinate boys.

He uses these stories along with Scripture to reveal truths about diligence, initiative, honesty, promptness, responsibility, and many more aspects of character and work ethic.

Two of my sons favorite chapters are “Dirt” and “The Donut Race.” “Dirt” is about a guy who never lets dirt get in the way of completing his work. “The Donut Race” is about two boys who race each other to a donut shop one morning before school. One boy obeys the traffic laws, while the other one speeds. It’s an effective and humorous lesson on haste and also teaches how hasty people miss God because God is never in a hurry.

Having personally read this book with my own son when he was 8, and now re-reading it again with him at age 10, I give “Created For Work” two thumbs up as an excellent way for dads to spend quality time with their sons as well as impress on their minds key character qualities about work through reading together fun “guy-stories” and discussing the questions at the end of each chapter.

If you have a son, grandson, or know a boy or group of boys between the ages of 8 and 16, this book is highly recommended as an interactive resource. It is also an excellent gift idea for a boy or dad!

Learn More or Order This Resource

by Joey Watkins, Friday, August 29, 2008

I was walking across my bedroom toward the bathroom when a thought occurred to me…

“Am I just living WITH my family, or am I LEADING my family?”

There is a huge difference…

A dad who just lives WITH his family simply co-exists with them under the same roof.  He may share meals with them, drive in the same vehicle, watch the same tv shows, and sleep in the same house at night.

But in reality, his focus, his time, his thoughts, and his attention are primarily given to matters unrelated to his family such as his work, sports, hobbies, and other interests.

A dad who LEADS his family is entirely different.

His thoughts are daily on his children and his wife. He prays for his wife and children.

His work does not dominate his life, even though he works with all his heart when he IS working.

He values and priortizes time with his family. He blesses them with his words. He serves them in love.

He is intentional about personally instructing his children in the ways of God: teaching them about love, faith, truth, forgiveness, evil, and more.

Dad, carefully examine your daily patterns. Determine if you are just living WITH your family or LEADING them.

Your children desperately need their dad to LEAD them. Your wife desperately needs her husband to lead the family.

Your feedback: Give your feedback or input below to encourage or challenge other dads on this topic.

R E S O U R C E   for   D A D S

Raising A Modern-Day Knight

A Father’s Role in Guiding His Son to Authentic Manhood

Looking for a tool to guide your son into transitioning from boyhood to manhood? This book by Robert Lewis is perhaps the most popular on the topic. Lewis looks at what it means to be a man and then gives ideas and practical ways you can guide your son with confidence to authentic, Biblical manhood. Learn More

Click Here to Order This Resource

by Joey Watkins, Wednesday, August 20, 2008

Perhaps the clearest instruction to dads in the Old Testament of the Bible is found in Deuteronomy chapter 6.  Moses had gathered all the Hebrew men together — thousands of them – in a large group to give them direct instructions from God while they were in “transition” to their future home land.

“Hear, O Israel: the LORD our God is one LORD; And you shall love the LORD your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your might. And these words which I command you this day shall be in your heart; and you shall repeat them diligently to your children, and shall talk of them when you sit in your house and when you walk by the way, and when you lie down and when you rise up. And you shall bind them for a sign upon your hand, and they shall be as a token between your eyes. And you shall write them upon the doorposts of your house and on your gates.”

Maybe these instructions were just for a specific group of people for a specific timeframe. But I believe we see in this passage God’s ongoing pattern for parenting that applies to us today thousands of years later.

Dad, you and I are to repeat God’s word, His commands, His truth, to our sons and daughters. And to do so diligently. That means more than once or twice a week.

We are even told *where* and *when* to do so — at home, while traveling, at night, and in the mornings.

Notice it does NOT give options for passing this responsibility off to another person. It is a very clear and direct command to US.

Why? Because this is God’s plan for transmitting spiritual truth in the most EFFECTIVE manner possible! From dads to their children. God is well aware of “father power.” He created it. And He, of course, has the ultimate Father power!

What a privilege we dads have. What an honor. And what a tremendous responsibility. But we are called to do it. And it is up to us be diligent with our children.

Do you have input, insights, or experience on this topic? Please submit your comments and feedback below so that other dads can also be encouraged by your words.

R E S O U R C E   for   D A D S

by Voddie Baucham

In this book, Voddie Baucham, a father of 4 children himself, provides a great read for dads who want to instill their values and Biblical faith into their children and see it “stick” when they become adults. The message in this book will convict you, stir your heart, and encourage you to do whatever it takes to proactively lead your family. Learn More

Click Here to Order This Resource

by Joey Watkins, Thursday, August 14, 2008

Outside of the Bible, what book has most impacted you in your role as a dad?

For me, that question is very easy to answer. My wife and children would quickly agree with my answer because immediately after I read this particular book, they began seeing a very noticeable change in my choices, my actions, the time I spent with them, the things we did together as a family, and other evidences of major impact. And this book’s impact has not diminished.

Outside of the Bible, the book that has most impacted me in my role as a dad is Father Power by Todd Wilson.

Below is a short portion from Chapter 1. If you have not read this book, I of course highly recommend doing so… very soon. It will change your life… and your family.

"Guess what an adult believes about God whose earthly father was always gone on business or too busy at the office? He or she believes God cares very little about his life. He can be reached if something big comes up, but he’s uninvolved in the daily aspects of life."

"On the flip side, if a father communicates love and acceptance, his children will grow up believing God loves them. They will be able to succeed and fail without fear. They will turn to their heavenly Father and trust Him, because they were able to turn to their earthly father and trust him."

"They won’t struggle with accepting God’s love. It will come as naturally as a hug from dad."

"Why? Is it because they have a great grasp on their theology and doctrines of God? NO! They will view God in that way because their father taught them to, whether intentionally or not."

"That’s Father Power with a capital P. That’s the power you wield. It affects not only your children, but your children’s children and their children as well."

"How you wield the power will affect the way your great grandchildren view God. Your influence ripples across generations to come. Wow! Awesome! Incredible! And, really, really scary!"

"Dad, I can’t overstate the extent of your power. What your children will one day become is largely dependent on you. What they believe or don’t believe about God will come from you. The little words you say or don’t say will be cherished or bitterly remembered forever."

"Why? …Father Power."

"God has laid upon fathers the responsibility of transmitting His truth to the world, one child at a time."

"Am I diminishing the power of God’s written Word? NO! Am I saying that people can’t get saved without the aid of another human being? No! What I am saying is that your incredible influence as a dad is the single greatest means of assuring that future generations will follow God. Getting the right men into politics or fighting for religious freedom isn’t the key. The key to turing this country around and even the world is through father power."

R E S O U R C E   for   D A D S

Father Power

by Todd Wilson

Being a dad is the coolest, yet most demanding, thankless, overwhelming job on the planet. It is also the most important job you will ever… I mean EVER have.

by Joey Watkins

Today’s message is dedicated to all dads everywhere who have children still living at home. I pray this message will penetrate our hearts and impact our actions.

As tempting and overwhelming as it is, we must not let our work consume us. It is so passively easy to get wrapped up in our work, be absorbed in thoughts and actions to get our work done, take on more projects, try to bring closure to existing projects, focus our effort and energy on our work, and give constant attention to our job/career/business to generate more income or because our identity, purpose, or calling are falsely tied to our work.

All at the expense of our family… our wives and children. They crave time with us. They desperately need our time. They need us to simply spend time with them. Often. Daily.

They need our influence. They need relationship with us. And this cannot happen if our work consumes us.

Are our wives and children not the most important people on earth in our lives?

Do we not cherish them greater than everyone else?

Let us then be committed as dads to prioritize them. Every day. Not just on the weekends when we “unwind” from our work.

“But my work is my sacrifice for my family and my way of providing for them.”

The Bible says in 1 Samuel 15:22 that “…to obey is better than sacrifices.” God has called each of us dads to obey Him and His Word in raising our children and loving our wives. And that involves our TIME and proactive involvement in their lives.

As a husband and dad with 4 young children, I constantly remind myself of this message. I pray it stays at the top of your thoughts too.

R E S O U R C E S   for   D A D S

by Joey Watkins

Dad, has your son or daughter ever done something that really upset you? Maybe made you question what you were doing "wrong" as a parent to have caused him or her to act a certain way or say a certain thing?

Here’s a recent example from my own family…

This past week, our family spent 9 hours together in a car driving home from a long trip. When we finally arrived, we were all rather tired and cranky.

While getting ready for bed, my two youngest children got into a spat over something very silly… as is usually the case when children argue.

They were fighting over our "drinking water."

My youngest son, who is only 5, was unwilling to drink the water that was available in our house because it was not "cold" due to our water cooler having been unplugged while we were away on our trip.

Can you believe that?!!

My first thought was something like…

"What a spoiled rotten brat! He should be grateful that we even have bottled spring water to begin with. He has no idea there are billions of children around the world who don’t even have clean drinking water — much less COLD clean spring water! He has no idea how good he has it!!!"

And with that, I proceeded to vent at both him and my wife, telling him to drink the water that WAS available, or else go to bed thirsty.

What a great response from Dad, eh?! I’m sure you’ve never done anything like this

The nerve of this "spoiled" little 5-year-old kid demanding **cold** water.

It’s now a few days later, and I just remembered a recent rant of my own when our family was in Florida last week.

I had walked into the kitchen to pour a glass of water, and there wasn’t any cold water available because no one remembered to refill the water pitcher we kept in the refrigerator.

And yes, my entire family heard this grown man… Dad… rant and blame his family for something so silly.

I think I owe my family an apology — and explain to my 5-year-old son that he and dad were both wrong and should be grateful for water whether it is cold or not.

It never ceases to amaze me how our children learn from the actions and words of their dad. Especially when dad is not in "teaching" mode.

R E S O U R C E S   for   D A D S

Revolutionary Parenting

by George Barna

Determined to learn the secrets of those who’ve raised spiritual champions, world-renowned researcher George Barna conducted a series of surveys and thousands of personal interviews with both young adults and their parents.

by Joey Watkins, Friday, July 18, 2008

July is quickly passing by, and that means so is summer for those of us in the northern hemisphere.

Summers are, of course, unique for our sons and daughters.

It is the time of year when most of them are out of school and have more time for other activities, summer jobs, time with friends…

And more opportunities for us dads to spend time with them.

How am I doing with spending time with my children so far this summer?

Have I taken extra time off work to be with my family?

Am I taking advantage of my kids being out of school for these few short weeks?

If not, let me encourage you to maximize the remainder of the summer and do so.

Be intentional about spending time with your children.  Work can wait. It will always be there. Your kids won’t.

R E S O U R C E S   for   D A D S

How To Be Your Daughter’s Daddy

by Dan Bolin

365 Ideas to spend time with your daughter and show your love and care to her.  Learn More and Order

How To Be Your Little Man’s Dad

by Dan Bolin

365 things to do with your son and model fatherhood to him.  Learn More and Order

by Joey Watkins

Many of my thoughts in recent months have been consumed by the level of influence that we dads have in our children’s lives and future.

My favorite term for this is “father power” which is from Todd Wilson’s book by that title, Father Power.

We dads wield a power — a level of influence — in our children’s lives that very few of us have much understanding of or are taking advantage of.

How do I know this is true?

Because I look at the amount of time we spend at our work, hobbies, tv, sports, Internet browsing, and our other interests compared to the amount of time we spend with our children.

The harsh reality is that we practice daily what we truly value. All the rest is just talk.

That is why I created a resource website for dads at www.DadResources.com

I want you as a dad to know about and have access to the very best resources available on fatherhood so you can maximize your father power in your family and effectively influence your sons and daughters with your values and faith while they are still at home with you.

And because you model fatherhood to your sons, when they become dads one day, they will be able to look back at how you raised them and have that as a very positive, healthy example.

Bookmark www.DadResources.com right now as your “go-to” site for dad resources.

And help spread the word about this resource site by telling other dads you know about www.DadResources.com.

If a particular resource has significantly impacted your life as a dad that isn’t already on this site, please let me know.

by Joey Watkins

July 4th weekend is upon us.  For many in the United States, it includes a day off work and watching fireworks.

For us family dads, it also offers many of us more time with our family than a usual weekend.

And an opportunity to create another lasting memory with them.

Here are 10 creative ideas to celebrate our country’s birthday with your family this weekend:

1. Have a “USA Birthday” family picnic complete with cake and candles ( don’t forget red, white, and blue icing!)

2. Go to an armed services memorial park and read the plaques together

3. Visit a cemetery and look for soldier gravesites

4. Visit a historic landmark that relates to our country’s “story”

5. Attend a muncipal fireworks display, parade, or other July 4th event

6. Have your own fireworks celebration in your driveway (don’t forget the sparklers)

7. Read the Declaration of Independence to your family

8. Read the history of July 4th, Independence Day, to your family

9. Creatively decorate your yard together with American flags

10. Make a red-white-blue meal or treat with colored ingredients
(Hint: strawberries, blueberries, whipped cream, etc.)

Bonus#11! Serve a family whose dad is overseas in the armed services

We certainly want to remember the many thousands of family dads who are overseas this weekend and are unable to be with their family. We are indebted to you for your sacrifice and service to your country.

Here is a very special video clip of a soldier Dad who returned home from Iraq for a surprise visit to his young son. It chokes me up every time I watch it.