Last week I got creative with our family white board, which we usually use for Scripture teaching or school-related work.

As my children curiously watched me grab one dry-erase marker after another, I drew a picture of my brain in the middle with lots of bubble-captions all around it. Each bubble consisted of something that is currently weighing on my mind.

And I ran out of space on the white board trying to list everything!

My goal was to show my wife and children all the things and “projects” that consume much of my thoughts so they would know why I often feel overwhelmed and “focused” much of the time.

This morning I told my wife I was transferring all these “thoughts” into a text file on my computer.

That’s when she dropped a bomb on me. A huge bomb.

She said… “Make sure you include your children on your list.”

Ka-BOOM! Whoa! I had not even so much as written their names on the white board!

And yet, outside of my faith and my wife, they are the highest priorities in my life. Or are they?

Why did I not start at the top of the white board by listing my wife and children first??? Probably because I take them for granted too much of the time. Truth be told, it is more like MOST of the time.

This was a convicting reminder, once again, that I have to be continually INTENTIONAL — even VIGILANT — about communicating to each person in my family how important they are to me.

And not just with my words, but also with my time, my schedule, my actions.

That means some of the things on my white board won’t get done. At least not as soon as I want them to. But that’s part of being a family dad. We know the importance of prioritizing our family, and we are willing to “cheat” other things in our life so that our wife and children get more of our time and attention when they need it.

So… What’s on your white board?

Time for me to go make some modifications to mine.

From one family dad to another,
Joey Watkins
Host of FamilyDads.com

Our Family Whiteboard

“I love you son. I’m proud of you.”

Did you hear these words from your dad when you were growing up? If your dad is still alive, do you hear them from him now as an adult?

If you have a son, do you say these words to him? Very often?

Do you ever proclaim these words publicly about your son where both he and other men hear you?

“I love you son. I’m proud of you.”

In the New Testament of the Bible, there are only 3 recorded instances where God audibly spoke from heaven. Did you know that 2 of these 3 instances are God the Father communicating this very message to His Son Jesus?

At Jesus’ baptism, a voice from heaven spoke audibly to those who were present saying, “This is my beloved Son, in whom I am well pleased.” (Matthew 3:17, Mark 1:11, Luke 3:22)

At the mount of transfiguration, God again spoke, this time from a cloud, saying “This is my beloved son in whom I am well pleased. Hear him.” (Matthew 17:5, Mark 9:7, Luke 9:35, 2 Peter 1:17-18)

These are incredibly powerful and affirming words that boys and men of all ages long to hear — need to hear — from their father. It was important for God the Father to communicate this on more than one occasion audibly to His Son Jesus and those who were present. It was important for Jesus to hear these words audibly from His Father.

Likewise, it is important that we fathers speak these words audibly to our sons.

“I love you son. I’m proud of you.”

Every once in a while, a song with a powerful message for us dads comes along.

Trace Adkins recorded the song “You’re Gonna Miss This” that spent a lot of time at #1 on the charts for good reason.

Maybe you’ve heard it?

It’s a message reminding us parents how quickly our children grow up, and how soon we’re going to miss them and all those moments when they were young.

My wife and I both got blurry eyes the first time we heard this song.

The lyrics to the chorus are:

You’re gonna miss this.

You’re gonna want this back.

You’re gonna wish these days hadn’t gone by so fast.

These are some good times,

So take a good look around.

You may not know it now,

but you’re gonna miss this.

Below is official music video with Trace Adkins. It’s a great song to listen to again and again — like on one of those days when being a parent isn’t, shall we say, so much fun.

This video is embedded from YouTube. If you are unable to view it, click here.

One night during the Thanksgiving holidays, my 6-year-old son was up late. His older brother and sister had already gone to bed and he was still wide awake, which is unusual for him because he’s usually the first one asleep.

Sensing an opportunity to spend some quality one-on-one time with him, I asked him if he wanted to go for a walk with me to see the moon and stars.

Bundling up in our coats and gloves, we ventured out into the cold, crisp night air with no agenda other than just to chat, walk, and take in the night sky together — which he loved.

As we walked, my son would talk about something and then ask “Right Dad?” to which I casually answered “uh-huh” not really considering his questions carefully. After this went on 3 or 4 times, it occurred to me that I might be saying “right” to something that may not have been right.

So I began listening to him more carefully.

The “Right Dad?” question must have come up at least ten more times during our walk. I wasn’t counting, but I began to notice that my son’s “Right Dad?” questions were really not so much about whether he was right or not about a certain thing, but more importantly…

He was wanting AFFIRMATION, VALIDATION, and ACCEPTANCE from the most powerful man in his life… his dad.

Basically, he was looking for my approval of him — that he was “valid” or “approved” or “accepted” by me.

In his booklet You Have What It Takes, best-selling author John Eldredge says every boy is asking the same basic question in his heart: Do I have what it takes? He wants to prove himself to his dad. He wants to impress him. He wants to be loved and accepted by his father. He is looking to his father for gender identity.

This is how God designed it. For us dads to bestow this upon our sons. No one on earth is more powerful in our sons lives than we are as their dads.

It’s something I need to be reminded of regularly. And maybe this little story will help remind you too… Right Dad?

Blessings to you and your family,

Joey Watkins

Founder, FamilyDads.com

P.S. – It’s almost too late to get a Christmas Cross Light for your front yard or a To Bethlehem board game for your family to have fun together during the holidays. Also, we’ve listed some of our best-selling Christmas gift items that are on sale right now at DadResources.com.

A father had three grown children, two sons and a daughter.

One son was divorced. The other son was getting ready to file for a divorce.

The parents had never liked their son’s wife and had tried everything they could to split the marriage and find him another wife.

The sons and the father had a broken relationship. It was so bad, if either son even saw him in a store, they walked down another aisle to avoid him.

There was much bitterness and hatred.

Yet this was a father who was very involved in church, even in prominent leadership roles.

The father attended an event where he heard about God’s promise and provision to fathers, God’s blueprint for the family, and the Biblical role of the father.

God turned the heart of this father in a very significant way… toward his sons, toward his family.

He was so convicted about his failure as a father, he asked himself…

“Is it too late? I’ve already done my child rearing. My children are adults now.”

He wrote 12 letters to his sons. Letters of repentance…

“Would you please forgive me for not being the father to you I should have been?”

“I didn’t know I was supposed to do anything with you?”

“I didn’t know how to call you out as sons?”

“I want to minister to you now.”

“I want to be the father to you that God intended me to be.”

As the father did that, and his heart was turned toward his children, God turned the hearts of his children to him.

The first son turned his heart to God for the first time, came to his father, and began to confess to him things he had done wrong.

The 2nd son, on the very day of filing divorce papers, after listening to the teachings from the event the father attended, was so convicted that he confessed his own sins and turned his heart to seek God.

His wife said when he walked in the door, she immediately knew something had changed his life. She said “I want that” and came with him to his parents for counseling! The parents confessed to the daughter-in-law how they had not loved her and all the things they done against her.

The dad sent the teaching messages to his daughter. Her husband listened.

The daughter said it completely changed his heart and turned his heart toward his family.

God healed this family!

It is a testimony of God’s promise to broken families:

“Behold, I will send you Elijah the prophet before the coming of the great and dreadful day of the LORD; And he shall turn the heart of the fathers to the children and the heart of the children to their fathers…” ~Malachi 4:5-6

God keeps His word.  He  will turn the hearts of a family back to the fathers when the heart of the father is turned to the children.

Norm Wakefield will be sharing this teaching at the Dad Summit, the first-of-its-kind LIVE webinar event for dads. It starts this Sunday night at 9pm Eastern. There is still time to save $15 on Advance Registration.

Blessings to you and your family,

Joey Watkins

Founder, FamilyDads.com