While taking a prayer walk recently, I was reflecting on the fact that my dad turned 72 this past year and was now fully in the “4th quarter” of his life.

3 thoughts quickly filled my mind.

30 years from now, my dad will be gone.

I will be at the same stage of life my dad is now.

And my oldest son will be my age — likely with a family of his own.

It begged several questions in my mind:

“What will it be like not having my dad around?”

“When I am his age looking back, will I be pleased with how my life turned out?”

“What am I doing to prepare my sons for their journey ahead as men, husbands, and fathers?”

Sure, they’re just kids now. And 30 years is a long time — or is it?

I believe it’s very healthy to contemplate the future. As leaders of our families, we dads must have vision. We must have plans to turn our vision into reality. And we must have perseverance and discipline to be consistent and proactive in leading our families.

Here’s an example to illustrate this.

One of my highest priorities for my children is that they have a strong knowledge and love of Scripture when they are adults. That’s part of my vision for them.

So we read Scripture together. As a family. Often. Each of our children (who are old enough to read) has their own copy of Scripture. We have “Scripture Reading Time” several times a week (my goal is daily.) We all sit together in our family room in a circle or around our dining room table. I start and we go around the room taking turns reading. I give commentary and we discuss what we read along the way. It’s a great way for them to build communication skills, but more importantly to discuss and absorb Scripture from their father. From their father – the one who was divinely given the greatest influence in their lives.

We’re also working on memorizing Scriptures together as a family, learning to hide it in our hearts (Psalm 119:11) and meditate upon it (Psalm 1:2).

This is just one example of how vision becomes reality, and I’d love to hear what visions you have for your family and what you are doing to see them come to pass. So please post your comments below, and let’s learn from one another.

And always remember…

“Come now, you who say, ‘Today or tomorrow let us go into this city and spend a year there, trade and make a profit.’ Whereas you do not know what your life will be like tomorrow. For what is your life? You are like a thin mist that appears for a little time and then vanishes away.” -YA’acob 4:13-14 (called James in modern Bibles)

Blessings to you and your family,
Joey Watkins
A fellow Family Dad

Last week I was with two of my kids at their favorite spot down in our woods which has a tree that blew over and is laying on its side in the shape of a rainbow.

At about 5 feet off the ground at its highest point, this “rainbow tree” as we’ve named it makes a perfect athletic challenge for my kids who love to climb on it.

My eight-year-old son made his way to the highest part of the sideways trunk and proudly asked me…. “Dad, is this dangerous?”

Without hesitation, I *almost* replied… “No, not really. It’s not that high.”

But then, I had a slight impression to mentally probe a little deeper into the motive behind his question. What was he really asking me?

“Dad, am **I** dangerous?” “Dad, do I have what it takes to be a man?” “Dad, as my father, as the man I most look up to, respect, and admire at this stage of my life, do you affirm me?”

Before me was an opportunity to either casually ignore my son’s inquisition about his growth toward manhood, or to build him up in it.

“Yes, son. That IS dangerous. Be careful!” came out of my mouth instead.

And so, with a smile back at me, my son continued to conquer the sideways rainbow tree, beaming at the thought of how “dangerous” he was. In a good way.

Application for me as a dad: Always consider my words when interacting with my children. Never be flippant in my responses to them. Sometimes, probably more often than not, there is more “below the surface” to their questions. When giving answers, look for ways to affirm, validate, and communicate to my children that I love them deeply and respect them as individuals.

For daughters, the questions may come out more like… “Am I pretty?” “Can you spend time with me?” “Can we do something together?” For she is looking for affirmation from her father of both her outward AND inward beauty. And she wants to know that you treasure her and desire to pursue relationship with her.

And remember… this applies to our children at any age.

Blessings to you and your family,
Joey Watkins
a fellow Family Dad

PS – One of the most impactful interviews I’ve ever heard on this topic of validating our sons and daughters as their fathers was this video interview with John Eldredge. It’s a MUST-WATCH!

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One of the questions I ask new FamilyDads subscribers is to identify one of their biggest challenges as a dad.

More often than not, the answer I receive has to do with balancing family and work, stress, patience with their kids, and things like that.

However, one new subscriber recently shared one of his biggest challenges as a dad that I had never heard before. It really got me thinking, and I want to challenge you with it too.

He said one of his biggest challenges as a dad is:

“…not having my Dad around to ask advice, he went to be with the Lord 3 years ago.”

Whoa! That is pretty heavy.

I had several reactions when I read it.

First, I don’t want my sons to be in that position when they become dads one day. I want them to be able to come to me for advice and input when they need it. I want them to draw on my experience, insights, knowledge, and wisdom I’ve gained over the years.

Yes, we all will experience physical death at some point (unless our Messiah returns first!), but I want to be around as long as possible for my family. But unless I take personal responsibility for my health now by my choices in diet, exercise, sleep, and several other fitness factors, I’m not doing my part to make it happen.

Second, I reflected on my relationship with my own father. Do I take him too much for granted? How much longer will he be around? Am I taking advantage of his advice and experience? Is there anything I can do to help or encourage his health and longevity? How is our relationship?

And finally, I wondered about other young men who might be in a similar place without their earthly dad to go to for wisdom and advice as they walk this journey called fatherhood. Can FamilyDads do more to support these men? Are there any subscribers who would be interested in building relationships with fatherless sons like this guy?

Well, that’s a lot to think about. I hope it will do just that… get you thinking… about yourself, about your father, about other fatherless men, and about your own sons when they become dads and will need your advice and experience to draw on!

Feel free to contact FamilyDads with any ideas, suggestions, or input on any of these thoughts.

Blessings to you and your family,
Joey Watkins
Founder, FamilyDads

P.S. – FamilyDads Fitness is for dads who understand the importance of giving attention NOW to your health and fitness to avoid health problems later that would impact both you and your family. Learn more

Would you like to know one of the very best uses of your time and your influence as a dad? One of the very BEST long-term investments you can make in your children?

READ with them. ALOUD. Frequently.

ALL of my children enjoy spending time reading aloud together with their Dad. So does my wife.

On an almost daily basis, I read Scripture aloud to my family. We call it “Family Scripture Time.”

For younger children, Scriptures with action and stories work best, like Genesis, Exodus, and Acts, as opposed to more instructional Scriptures like Leviticus, Proverbs, Galatians, etc.

Consistent Scripture reading is one of the best ways to prepare the soil of their hearts for receiving spiritual truth and building their faith.

“So faith comes by hearing, that is by hearing The Word of YHWH proclaimed.” – Romans 10:17

I also like to read one-on-one with my children. My sons have enoyed the books by Bob Schultz. The chapters are short, fun, “guy” stories that always have a great message on character or boyhood, and Q&A at the end so we can talk about what we’ve read.

My daughter and I have read some of the “classics” together… you know, the ones that seem to always involve a little girl, a horse, a dog, or life on a farm.

If you’ve read a book with your son or daughter they’ve really enjoyed, please let me know. We’ll add it to the list of great family reading books. If you become a FamilyDads email subscriber, we can send you the list as it grows over time so you and your family can benefit from other dads’ positive reading experiences with their children.

To summarize, if you aren’t already reading aloud to your family, take the lead and begin doing this.

Read Scripture together as a family as often as possible.

And read family-friendly books one-on-one with your children. Not only will they benefit from the content you read together, but you’ll be modeling to them a habit they can emulate when they too become parents. And even pass on to their children.

From one family dad to another,
Joey Watkins
Founder, FamilyDads.com

PS – Don’t forget to contact us with books you’ve read with your son or daughter they’ve liked.

On a cold winter morning on his family’s Pennsylvania farm, 8-year-old Trevor Beam made one false step inside a harvester wagon. His bulky winter jacket was snagged in the machinery and he was pulled into spiked bars that could have killed him instantly.

He survived the accident, but all the doctors thought he would lose his right leg and be crippled for life.

Yet after only 3 weeks in the hospital, and less than 2 months after his accident, Trevor walked into his doctor’s office on his own in a walker.

And less than 2 months later, he was walking unassisted, completely whole, and WITHOUT EVEN A LIMP! Graphic photos taken of Trevor’s legs after the accident demonstrate how remarkable this healing was.

Trevor’s Song is the amazing story of fatherly love, childlike faith, and a remarkable testimony of physical healing. It’s the story of a little boy who defied everyone’s expectations; a little boy who lived when he should have died and who walked again when he should have been crippled.

It’s also the story of an earthly father who refused to give up.

Most of all, it’s the story of a heavenly Father who hears and answers prayer; who comforted a distraught earthly father with the words, “Trevor is My son too, and I’m going to take good care of him.”

Pictures of Trevor Beam and his family - Warning: Very Graphic Pictures of Trevor’s Legs are Below

Beam Family

Trevor Beam

Harvest Wagon

Trevor Playing Football After Healing

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WARNING: GRAPHIC PHOTOS BELOW OF TREVOR’S LEG INJURY

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CAUTION: THESE ARE VERY GRAPHIC

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Trevor’s Song: The Miraculous True Story of God’s Healing Power After a Tragic Farm Accident

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