Making big decisions is something we dads have to do from time to time. Because of their importance and the process involved, today’s post is a bit longer than most.

A dad recently asked for my input on a very big decision he is considering — a career change from being employed to self-employment at home so he can give more time to his family.

Since this is something I have done — more than once — I shared with him from my experiences and thoughts on making big decisions. My response doesn’t cover everything on this topic, but here is what I said…

Regarding transitioning to working at home, I commend you highly on that decision. The benefit of having the flexibility with your time by working at home is extremely rewarding, much more-so than making more money working for someone else at the expense of time away from your family.

Having said that, I can also tell you it can be very challenging. Among other things, you must be very disciplined to focus on your work, and you do face risk of lapses in income.

First and foremost, you must be led by God’s spirit. Listen to His still, small voice and the impressions He speaks to your heart. Pay attention as you read the Bible and as you listen to other believers (not just Bible teachers but ALL believers who are walking with God.)

Second is unity with your wife. You must both be very confident and united in God’s direction. As the leader, you must take the action steps, but you should desire and esteem her input very highly.

God has confirmed His will for my wife and I on many occasions by speaking the same thing to us separately. It is amazing and very confirming when we come together and discover He has been telling us each the same thing. When this does not happen, I tend to not make a decision but continue to seek Him, listen to what He is saying to me, wait on His timing, and confirmation.

Third, God sometimes stirs in our hearts a longing/desire for the direction He wants us to go. For me, he put a heavy burden on my heart for dads to discover and embrace their influence and leadership as dads in their families.

In what way do you desire to help other people? What problem do you want to solve? What can you see yourself doing day in and day out? Once you have identified this, begin to discern God’s specific leading in relation to it.

A brochure I once picked up said this on the cover… “If you followed your heart, where would you go?” This question was so profound yet simple to me, I still keep that brochure in my laptop bag to this day as a reminder to continue to ask myself that question when facing important decisions.

Obviously, our hearts can deceive us if our desires are impure, but scripture tells us God shows Himself strong on behalf of those who are wholehearted toward Him. (Read the story surrounding 2 Chronicles 16:9.)

Fourth, be attentive to your circumstances and notice any repetition. When I was seeking God on moving, He identified a particular city and then one time after another brought up the name of that city through numerous random circumstances. Circumstances by themselves aren’t everything, but I have found them to be very important when seeking direction from God on a matter.

FInally, let me leave you with a quote that riveted me the first time I read it… “God responds to our faith, not our needs.” Jesus was frustrated, disappointed, and even limited in what He could do on numerous occasions when he encountered lack of faith.

Be a man of faith, which means simply “relying on God.” Don’t be presumptuous and foolish in your actions, but wait on God and step out in faith and obedience as He leads you. Do not merely make decisions based on logic and reason.

I recently had to make a very important decision that did not make sense from a financial standpoint, but I felt very strongly that God told me the time to make the decision was now and not wait for everything to fall into place financially first. My wife was in full support of this decision. So I took the step of faith and “stepped out into the water” BEFORE it parted, so to speak!

Here’s the bottomline…

“Trust in the LORD with all your heart and do not lean on your own understanding. In all your ways acknowledge Him, and He shall direct your paths.” ~ Proverbs 3:5-6

I hope this helps you with decisions you may be facing in your life and on behalf of your family. You might want to bookmark this post for future reference, and also forward it to other dads you may know who need encouragement in making decisions.

Blessings to you and your family,

Joey Watkins

Founder, FamilyDads.com

Caught Between A Dream and a Job offers very practical help for transitioning from a job you don’t enjoy to pursuing your dreams. This book helps you identify your ultimate purpose and helps you transition startegically from where you are to where you really want to be. Watch a video interview with the author and Learn More and Order.

A great Family Dad finished his earthly life last week… in the prime of fatherhood.

On October 12th, Chris Klicka, a 48-year-old faithful husband and father to 7 children, passed away after a 15-year battle with the symptoms of Multiple Sclerosis.

His life, his commitment to his family, and his vocational work were an inspiration to many and a blessing to those who knew Chris personally.

Chris worked as an attorney for Homeschool Legal Defense Assn. and helped many families who faced obstacles exercising their right to homeschool.

This past June — just 4 months before his death — Chris was interviewed about his physical struggle and how he dealt with his feelings and suffering with MS. His attitude was amazing. The words he shared leave us dads with a profound message on suffering, discouragement, pain, priorities, and the brevity of life.

As dads, part of leading our families involves the work God calls us to. Among other things, our work is a significant means of income, a primary channel through which God, our source of provision, supplies money to us and our family.

So imagine this scenario at your place of work. It’s Friday afternoon and your supervisor steps into your office with a seemingly casual question…

“Can you come into the conference room for a brief meeting?”

You finish your email, save the document, or complete whatever task you are right in the middle of, and then make your way down the hall to the company conference room. In the past, you’ve participated in many staff meetings, strategy planning sessions, and even birthday parties in this conference room, but none like today’s meeting.
“As you know, our company’s revenue has gone way down in recent months, and we’ve had to evaluate ways to significantly cut costs. Effective immediately, your position is being eliminated.”

And with that, you find yourself out of a job — without any advance notice and through no fault of your own. What makes this especially painful is the fact that you have given five years of faithful service to your company, many of those weeks spent working well over 40 hours.

When God closes a door in our lives — especially a major one like our work — the natural tendency is to panic and to project negative “what if” scenarios about our future. If we haven’t been in close relationship with God and regularly hearing from Him, we can be be easily overcome by feelings of fear, rejection, and even anger.

The song lyrics of “Look For A Window” give encouragement and advice to the person facing this very scenario:

Hot on the trail of God’s will
And getting warmer still
Stopped by the slam of a door
God, what’d You do that for?

When God closes a door, look for a window
Don’t stand at the door, there might be a window

Responsibilities change
And so do our pathways
One way God shows which way to go
Is to let the old road close

There’s no point in getting down on yourself
God is only pointing you somewhere else

In challenging times like this, a wise dad will go to God with this attitude in his heart and prayers…
“God, this did not take you by surprise. You knew this was going to happen, and You knew when it would happen. I am so grateful that you take care of me and my family. Help me guard my heart and my thoughts as I seek to know what you are doing in my life and what the next step is for me to take. You know our financial needs, and You are the source of provision for my family. So help me remain full of faith in You during this time, waiting on You, listening for Your promptings, and obedient to whatever You tell me. And thank You for your faithfulness to me during the past five years that I worked at this company.”

As I consider my closing thoughts on this topic, my six-year-old son, totally unaware of what I am writing about, just blurted out in the other room…

“Do you know what song I have in my head right now?”

He then proceeded to sing a kid’s song version of Matthew 6:34 which says, “Do not worry about tomorrow; for tomorrow will look after itself.”

I suspect that verse is directly for someone who will read this. Out of the mouth of babes!

If you’re in the midst of job transition, stay encouraged, and continue to…

“Trust in the LORD with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding.
In all your ways acknowledge Him, and He shall direct your paths.” ~Proverbs 3:5-6

Blessings to you and your family,
Joey Watkins
Founder, FamilyDads.com

PS – This would be a good post to forward along to another dad you may know who is in the midst of job transition. Also, take him out for lunch or breakfast and spend some time with him talking and praying together. He would probably appreciate your friendship, kindness, and prayer support right now.

Do you know the five Biblical uses of money, the spiritual power behind money, the symptoms to guage where you are spiritually with your finances, and the two different economic systems in the world? Learn More

Recently, I took my 8-year-old daughter out for one of her most favorite events… a date with dad.

After a fun visit to enjoy the furry and feathered animals at a local pet store, we walked across the parking lot to a newly built massive furniture store. It was HUGE — taking up at least a city block, if not more.

Once inside, we were immediately impressed with the size of the store, and even more impressed as we walked around looking at the variety and quality of all the expensive furniture inside.

That’s when I began to notice something potentially DANGEROUS happening in my heart.

I sat down and leaned back in a very nice leather recliner couch. It was luxurious and very comfortable.  I casually mentioned to my daughter, “This is much nicer than our couch.” She agreed.

Then we went over to the bedding section and began testing the selection of mattresses, laying down on one after another. Again, we commented on how much more comfortable and nicer they were than ours at home.

After wandering around the store together through room after room of showroom furniture, we finally made our way back to the entrance.

Heading back across the parking lot, we walked past a late-model luxury car. I noticed the inside, which sported an elegant wood trim dashboard console and stylish leather interior.

“Wow,” I thought to myself. “That car sure is a lot nicer than ours.”

My heart wrestled with these longings for “bigger and better”, “nicer and newer” things as we made our way to our car. Before me was a choice: to allow discontentment to take root in my heart, or to be thankful and grateful for the provisions God had already given to me and my family.

When we compare the provisions God has already given us with newer, nicer, more expensive, and more comfortable items that don’t belong to us, there is usually a struggle, a wrestling, a temptation, a DANGER — envy, covetousness, and discontentment.

Whether it’s a new car, a recreational vehicle, furniture, a house, or even our spouse, when we compare what has already been provided to us with what is “out there” in the marketplace, a tv commercial, a webpage, or even another person, we run the risk of becoming discontent in our hearts. Which can lead to foolish decisions and regrets, bondage to debt, and even more tragic consequences in our lives.

If we compare any provision God has given us with something else that we don’t have, there is potential for danger around the corner. We must always be on guard, paying attention to what is happening in our hearts in any given situation.

“Keep your heart with all diligence, for out of it are the issues of life.” ~Proverbs 4:23

Blessings to you and your family,
Joey Watkins
Founder, FamilyDads.com

Attention Dads with Daughters: Two Great Resources

She Calls Me Daddy Seven Things Every Man Needs To Know About Building A Complete Daughter Learn More

What A Daughter Needs From Her Dad How A Man Prepares His Daughter For Life Learn More

A father had three grown children, two sons and a daughter.

One son was divorced. The other son was getting ready to file for a divorce.

The parents had never liked their son’s wife and had tried everything they could to split the marriage and find him another wife.

The sons and the father had a broken relationship. It was so bad, if either son even saw him in a store, they walked down another aisle to avoid him.

There was much bitterness and hatred.

Yet this was a father who was very involved in church, even in prominent leadership roles.

The father attended an event where he heard about God’s promise and provision to fathers, God’s blueprint for the family, and the Biblical role of the father.

God turned the heart of this father in a very significant way… toward his sons, toward his family.

He was so convicted about his failure as a father, he asked himself…

“Is it too late? I’ve already done my child rearing. My children are adults now.”

He wrote 12 letters to his sons. Letters of repentance…

“Would you please forgive me for not being the father to you I should have been?”

“I didn’t know I was supposed to do anything with you?”

“I didn’t know how to call you out as sons?”

“I want to minister to you now.”

“I want to be the father to you that God intended me to be.”

As the father did that, and his heart was turned toward his children, God turned the hearts of his children to him.

The first son turned his heart to God for the first time, came to his father, and began to confess to him things he had done wrong.

The 2nd son, on the very day of filing divorce papers, after listening to the teachings from the event the father attended, was so convicted that he confessed his own sins and turned his heart to seek God.

His wife said when he walked in the door, she immediately knew something had changed his life. She said “I want that” and came with him to his parents for counseling! The parents confessed to the daughter-in-law how they had not loved her and all the things they done against her.

The dad sent the teaching messages to his daughter. Her husband listened.

The daughter said it completely changed his heart and turned his heart toward his family.

God healed this family!

It is a testimony of God’s promise to broken families:

“Behold, I will send you Elijah the prophet before the coming of the great and dreadful day of the LORD; And he shall turn the heart of the fathers to the children and the heart of the children to their fathers…” ~Malachi 4:5-6

God keeps His word.  He  will turn the hearts of a family back to the fathers when the heart of the father is turned to the children.

Norm Wakefield will be sharing this teaching at the Dad Summit, the first-of-its-kind LIVE webinar event for dads. It starts this Sunday night at 9pm Eastern. There is still time to save $15 on Advance Registration.

Blessings to you and your family,

Joey Watkins

Founder, FamilyDads.com